And with my recent exhaustion, naturally came discouragement. My spouse tried to be supportive and shed light on the situation. He asked me "But aren't your books selling?" "Yes, but that's not the point!" I replied. I was not looking at present status, but the long journey ahead of me. I was thinking of the long, windy, uncertain road ahead. If this was only the beginning of the journey, and I am THIS exhausted, I still have a long ways to go. Not to mention the expense involved. It can take thousands of dollors to bring a single illustrated children's book to print (everyone along the publishing trail has to be paid).
I felt like I was at a crossroads! Or maybe I had made a wrong turn somewhere??? Did I make the right decision to self-publish (the unknown) instead of trying to go traditional publishing (mainstream)? Although many questions filled my head, no definitive answers came to me. I remembered the promises that God had spoken to me back in 2009. So why was I feeling so discouraged, exhausted, and indecisive of what to do next?? I prayed to the Lord to give me direction...
Well I awoke the next morning with a song in my spirit...HOWEVER, I didn't realize it!!!
Let me explain...
When I awoke the next morning, I was humming a song and partially singing it, but didn't realize what I had been doing until later. I got up, took a shower, and it wasn't until I got out of the shower that I even realized that I was humming/singing a song. YES, the Lord had placed a song in my heart and it wasn't until about thirty minutes after waking up, and humming/singing this song, that I even realized it. The song was in my head and spirit from the moment I woke up!!I didn't know all the lyrics and didn't know the title, but I knew the artist and part of the chorus. So later in the day I researched the lyrics to see what the Lord had actually placed in my spirit...through song!
Here is the song God put in my spirit the morning of Sept. 25th
"They That Wait On The Lord" by Fred Hammond
Listen, to those of you who are going through
For those of us who are waiting on His promise
Understand God has not forgotten you
When times get tough, you got to look up to Heaven
And encourage yourself and sing..
They that wait on the Lord
Shall renew their strength
They shall mount up on wings
Just like an eagle that soars
They shall run and not be weary
They shall walk and never faint
They that wait on the lord
And I say wait on the lord
Hold on a little while longer
Here's what you got to do
Trust and believe my friend
He'll work it out for you
One thing you must remember
My God is able and
He cares for you
He cares for you
Wait on the Lord and he will come through
Wait on the Lord he will answer you
Wait on the Lord and he won't be long
Wait on the Lord he's going to work for they that wait
The Lord is truly amazing!! He knows what troubles us even when we try to put up a brave face and act like nothing is bothering us. He is our comforter!! He comforts us in ways that we would never imagine or think (i.e. placing a song in my heart and not even realizing it). He gives us peace during our difficult times!! He calms the storms and fights our battles, even when some of those battles happen to come from within our own head...
Yes, I serve an amazing God! I am renewed, restored and at peace knowing that He is fully in control and IS directing my steps!!
Have you been feeling discouraged, exhausted, and/or indecisive lately? Seek out the Lord!!! Allow Him to put a new song in your spirit! :-)
T Densie Clary
"but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." Isaiah 40:31 (ESV)