A Little Humor for You!

A little Monday humor for you...This is an 'oldie but goodie' joke, thought I'd post! Have a wonderfully fun day!

God Bless!

T Denise Clary

Ducks in Heaven 

Three women die in a car accident and arrive at the pearly gates of Heaven. St. Peter greets them and says before they ever enter Heaven, "Whatever you do, don't step on the ducks!"

Well the women thought that this was a very odd thing to say, but when they enter Heaven, they see why he did! Ducks are EVERYWHERE!

The 1st woman was talking to the 2nd and, not paying attention, stepped on a duck. St. Peter appears at her side with a pair of handcuffs and a hideous man. "Now that you have stepped on a duck, you shall be chained to this man for the rest of your days here."


A few weeks later, the 2nd woman suffers the same fate.


Now the 3rd woman is determined to not step on a duck. Weeks, months even years pass, and she's yet to step on a duck. Soon, St. Peter has appeared at her side with the most beautiful man she'd ever laid eyes on and a pair of handcuffs. St. Peter handcuffs them and walks away without a word. "Whatever have I done to deserve this?" the woman asks.


"I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck." said the man.

A Little Humor For You...

a little Saturday humor for you...

The Atheist & The Bear --

An atheist was walking through the woods.

"What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" He said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look.  He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path.  He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He tripped & fell on the ground.

He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant moment, the Atheist cried out:

 "OH MY GOD!"

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

"You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident."

"Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?"

"Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, and said: "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well", said the voice.

The light went out.  The sounds of the forest resumed.  And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:

"Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from Thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."

God Bless!

T Denise Clary